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How to pick your bridal party members

  1. Don’t rush! As tempting as it is to ask all your favourite people the day after you get engaged, this isn’t the best idea. Once you’ve asked someone to be a part of your bridal party, you can’t really take it back, that would be super awkward. So take your time to think it over (not one day, more like one month if you can). Ask yourself how close you think you’ll be to this person in a few years’ time. If you’re still not sure, think about them in relation to your other bridal party members. Will they fit in and have a good time? Will they be easy-going and will their presence make things simpler or more complicated?
  2. Try to include siblings. Although everyone has different family dynamics, and this isn’t always possible, try your best. Technically speaking, your siblings (and your partner’s siblings), will be around the longest (and have already probably been around the longest!). There’s a big chance you and your siblings (or siblings-in-law) will become closer over the years, so don’t make the mistake of excluding them. If your or your partner’s siblings are super young, then include them in other ways. Have them hand out programs, say a little speech, or keep the rings safe.
  3. Be upfront with your expectations. If you need a bridal party that is very hands-on, as opposed to a bridal party that wears what you ask and show up on the day, then let everyone know. As much as you are asking people, they also have the right to answer you honestly, with a yes (or even a no!). If their schedules are too hectic, or they live far away, they may not be able to make the commitment to standing alongside you on your big day. Prepare for a no or two, and be understanding of other people’s situations.
  4. Don’t feel bad. Don’t ask people to be a part of your bridal party just because they asked you. There should be no expectations from the people who have asked you, and in the same way, those you ask should feel free to leave you out when their wedding comes around. You are asking those who YOU feel closest to at that particular time in your life, and the people you feel you have a long-term friendship with. However, friendships change, and you may not always be best friends with every single bridesmaid or groomsman in your bridal party for the rest of the time, and that’s totally fine!

Your bridal party are there to help you, calm you down and make you laugh. They are the people who love you the most and know you the best. Take your time to pick the right people, and savor every moment with them in the lead up to your big day (and on the day itself, obviously!).

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